You see, with homeschooling our son, living an hour away from church and friends, not speaking the language fluently and not having an extra car has made us very secluded in this beautiful area that feels very remote during the cold months. We have rooted ourselves here the best we could, but then friendships that keep both my son and I happy are not found here. Also, the fact that darkness comes crawling in by 4pm makes living by a lake pointless. When spring and summer rolls around so does the opportunity of enjoying life that is found outdoors. It feels so far away and when the joy of warmth comes it goes by all to quickly.
As I write this, I realize I need to seriously locate friends that speak english and are interested in connection here in Piestany. I'm not even sure how to go about this task and need to spend time in prayer as I know God can work in this area of loneliness in my life. Does anyone know a person who knits here, who homeschool's a child here or speak English? Let me know!
My life here is so beautiful, lonely and so different from the one I lived in Seattle and even when we traveled in an airstream. In Seattle, I had friends, clients, a career, and my own car. In the airstream, we traveled from one place to another which held adventure and something new each day. In the airstream I longed for friends and a home, but I had my husband who was my friend. In Ratnovce, I have that home, but no friends and my husband is only here a few hours in the evening and on weekends. He does get to work from home, but that does not count as he is working. Here, I homeschool Augustin and we stay at home until he has activities. Our evenings are spent doing homework so that he doesn't have to do school from 10am to 6pm. The break is appreciated.
Right now I am feeling a bit like I am complaining. The truth is this is my life. I am an extravert living and introverts life and being alone from Monday-Friday with my son from morning till 6pm isn't easy for me. I am struggling when it gets dark at 4pm and I can't take a single picture. Life feels bleak and you know what, I don't have to change how I feel. This is my reality. My life is beautiful, but very lonely. Friends are important to me! I had such a beautiful friendship in Seattle. I would get invited to my friends house for the day and I had them over from morning to dinner. It was refreshing for my soul.
I'll let myself feel this way and work on not changing it, masking it, but instead I will invite Jesus to change me and my state of loneliness I am in. Plus, some days are easier to bare then others. The grass is greener on the other side, I'll work on my side as spring and summer brings that green grass.